they are very independent and family life is good. Cold turkey. You’re so welcome. It's not a baby thing...I am not a baby person, but I love the toddler phase, and the idea of having three children...I am an only child, so have always imagined having a big family. It doesn’t speak well for me that I already feel like a lot of this applies despite only having one child does it?! There are some doubts, of course, but the positives of having a bigger family, and knowing that my two dc's would just adore a baby sibling. To anyone who has looked slightly aghast at the news, knowing, as they generally do, the chaos that an average week in our family entails. But I had my last child eight years ago? . - sorry! Life is flipping hard work with three kiddies but I’m sure you are doing brilliantly. ?needed this so badly! But when you feel that ache to hold another baby in … And nine months later, their third son was born. Our house (3-bed semi) is perfect size for the four of us, if we had any more kids then things, quite simply, would not work so well/easily imo. I'm a 37-year-old, single woman. We pondered on having a 3rd but it was just chat as a lot of my younger friends are now having babies and I have never felt finished. but most of all i'm worried about getting into my forties when it really might be too late, and realising that i really shouldve had that third baby.does anyone out there regret their decision not to have a third? I understand the hesitation, two children is the social norm. I was able to work from home with my first two. very interesting idea, moose re your visualisation of the shape of your family. Also, I have heard that a third child makes a huge difference in the family dynamic. Could you pls let me know how you decided and how is your life now? 1 Post. x x. I just posted over on another thread about this, but my husband finally changed his mind and decided - rather out of the blue I might add - that he wants us to have another child. All I keep thinking about is how extremely difficult it was to go from one to two. Etiquette experts explain whether or not you should have a baby shower for a second, third, or fourth child. I feel it’s been a huge difference going from 2 to 3 . This is the part where I say, ‘I wouldn’t change it for the world’ or ‘I wouldn’t turn the clock back’ and churn out a hundred other cliches blah, blah, blah. Some may start to wish for ways they could just go into labour right away. I love my two so much and happy with our family of four.Anyway, that was my very long answer to whether to have 3! Just re-read my comment, don’t mean to be such a grump just wish someone would write a “why to have a third baby.”. i have 2 16 sn and 18 i would have loved another 2 but its too late now not physically though at 46 would be a bit of a miracle just realtionship wise hope i dont get all bitter and twisted when im even older. It was easier to lean toward no. A household with an income of $50,000 receives a larger additional tax benefit for having a third child than having a second one. or is the transition inot babydom more seemless 3rd time round? But I'm here to say: Yes, you should have a third child. So I won't be even considering a third unless I get over this, and I'm not sure I ever will. Birth Order and the Third Child Each child may have unique emotional experiences. WE had a third - I regretted it occasionally in the incredibly hard first year (small gap)but have loved it ever since. I can’t decide ? I have a 4 yr old and 1 yr old and DH has said 'No More!'. I just think if we really want another, we'd regret NOT having one much more. Hello there, reading your post definitely confirmed everything I have been dreading about having a 3rd. It’s the first time I’ve seen your blog. I am currently expecting DS4, so maybe not ideally qualified to answer your question , however:DSs1 and 2 were 4 and 5 when DS3 came along. My boy and girl are fabulous as would another be, but is that the direction I want my life to take? It sounds trite but when they come along (even with its challenges) the dynamic is pretty amazing. Love this Amy and you’re spot on! . The missus cant even comprehend the thought. (Intimacy vs. Isolation- Erikson) Jan 26, 2015 - For Benjamin's 10th birthday, Nick and I got our family's first dog. You don’t even realize you are pregnant until you figure out the reason you have gained 20 pounds in four weeks is not solely due to all the playgroup morning teas. It’s very hard work, I’m a mum to 3 now aged 6, nearly 3 and 20 months. With quads. DS starts reception in September, DD will be in morning playgroup, and I am not going back to work until DD is in school, so it seems like it's the perfect time, too. We don’t have a car for the four of us for starters, but our younger son (who’ll be three in March) is still so awful at sleeping that we’ve become used to having no evenings together and hardly any sleep. Im a (widow )single mom now of a 15 and 5. I was highly disappointed that I had a baby so young and I have shared that with my daughter (the baby born). Thanks a lot ?. That made me giggle. I really regret not being able to have a third. Not that I would have only wanted a third on the basis of gender of course, that would be a mad situation to get in - I think I also wanted three because I'm one of three and it was fab growing up with a big brother and sister. for now, however, my p/t job is our main, regular income.there seem to be many very sensible reasons to 'stop at two', but i've been v broody for over a year now.i'm worried about having a big age gap. You really put a smile on my face with how spot on this is! They ultimately share that you can, but that you might want to modify the event—especially if … This was great! I don't know very much about pregnancy and having kids (I'm only 23) but I have a friend who wants to have a third child. Since men don’t hit … I am feeling the same - but perhaps have time on my side (I am 27, DS is 3 and DD is 1).I have been broody since DD was born but DH kept saying no.  On what I DO know, whilst they’re young. I have three grown up daughters and a 6 year old son. A third child feels like an indulgence; “more than the world needs”, to quote a friend and fellow mum of three. So funny, AND scary! I was honest and she has told me she appreciated my honestly. Am i selfish, inconsiderate, heartless? BTW, I was 37 when I had DS1... you do the maths ! they are very independent and family life is good.we have been badly hit by the recession but long term our financial circs will almost certainly improve. Birth Order and the Third Child Each child may have unique emotional experiences. i can really see that. Leanne- I didn’t understand your angry reply to this post until I read that you have 3 girls. It was like having a third child. We had lots of arguements over it, he always put forward his reasons which were mostly practical (finance, space etc). Follow Looking at the little picture on WordPress.com. Marking the impending birth of your first child with your friends and family is an expected rite of passage, but the etiquette for hosting another fête for future babies can get a little murky. I read through all 37 … Anyone eles single and pregnancy It’s so simple yet so genius! Because now that there are three, unique little individuals in my care, I honestly couldn’t say which one I’d put back. I totally get the washing machine one, and I only have 2! Hi,This is my first post, just discovered this website as I have just found out I am pregnant again with my 3rd child. We are doing A levels, gcse’ sand potty training . Our 2 kids are currently 2 & 3 years old (17 months between them), girl then boy. !Anyway...I'll keep checking back with you all, and let you know how it goes!! The pair seemingly announced that baby No. Tigger and I soon became the very best of friends and she never wanted to leave my side. I was a mess worrying about my first child after his sibling arrived. Yep, you’re getting a minivan. Someone told me there’s not much difference between 2 and 3 children but THAT’S A LIE!! whatever will be, will be, and all that jazz )good luck with whatever happens. I would desperately love to have another. Celebrity Babies of 2017 Read article. Just when you’ve settled into life with an HD-TV and PVR, you’re back to rubbing two sticks together to make fire. A household making $24,000 receives a slightly lower benefit for having a second child than a household making $23,000 or $25,000. He was 18 months on Friday. Also it sounds like you have a lot of love in your heart for another child. TWEET. Fans of the popular show will recall that Kathryn Dennis and Thomas have had a tough, drawn-out custody battle which definitely … As a father of 2 boys ( considering a third) I have been searching around for the pro’s & cons for expanding the team. there's a certain convenient tweeness about the 'family of 4' and i like the idea of a larger family.those with big age gaps, did you have a sense of 'going backwards' in terms of losing your freedom all over again, due to having a new born? (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage) Do you think the child … I have a boy 6 and girl 4 they are 2.5 years apart.  And for the five minutes each week, where everyone is synched in happiness, I look at our family and I feel perfectly content. I love it lol. August 20, 2019 by Lauren Turner. My eldest was 6 when my youngest daughter was born. I think I might wait until my youngest is 4 then see how I feel.  She has tweens AND teenagers all sewn up. In fact, when I picture us 10 or 20 years from now, all around the dinner table, I can’t imagine we’ll only be four. How v negative! i've felt like this for a good year. I want a boy if God grants my wish and I am 40 years old. Every child is unique. You’ll do anything to avoid it. Hi ladies, I have 10 year old and 4 year old daughters and my mom is here with us, my hubby works out of state, I have a full time job. My whole world revolves around Poppy at the moment. Brilliant Amy, just brilliant! Someone told me there’s not much difference between 2 and 3 children but THAT’S A LIE!!! If kind of feels like starting all over again! But let’s be … No ones family is the perfect family. Now I am having a difficulties to deciding to have or not a third child. I have a ds, 5, and a dd, 3. At the moment I am deciding whether to try for baby number 7. hour place is 3 bedromg bangalo plus a basemant withbtwo bedrooms and a full bathroom,is space for sure but Im just wonder am I too old for one more. Its now or never for me i think as j dont want a massive gap. I also worry about the age gap. The first is 4and the second is 2. SHARE. Do you think its selfish of me to have 3 when i already have a perfect family? Was interested to know if you’d decided to go ahead and how it’s going, etc 🙂. They knew there were tricky things about the age range, and it would have been easier if we had quit before the third child. EMAIL. ... as I don't have a story of regretting not having a third child but I thought you might like to hear my story, as I was in your position eighteen months ago. Honestly I don’t think she would have made it this far and still be a virgin if I had of hid how I felt about my situation of being a teen mom from her. I am totally on the fence. I was more relaxed and found babyhood so much easier third time round. its good to know i'm not alone in having this dialogue with myself.one thing that i would say re sex of baby is that i did at one time pine for a boy. Still, I understood why those friends were amused by our configuration. The age gap did and does mean we as a family had to adjust to baby demands once again ie nap times, 2 million things to take along when going out, etc. Having a child has completely changed me. I just don’t know if I should have a third. Only four months in, I’m really not qualified to write about three kids. I personally feel that baby no. I read through all 37 responses. i just dont feel that now. Before it tended to be dh and ds1 and me and ds2, but now we seem somehow to be more of a family and there aren't two separate factions these days, we all muck in together.I'm not saying its all been plain sailing. Why Jana Kramer and Mike Caussin Are Considering Having 3rd Child After Vasectomy. Its been difficult with 2and now 3 huh! October 14, 2013 — 0 Comments. Or that I’m not tied to my chair at home breastfeeding for 9 months?! If you'll be 35 or older on your due date, you'll be offered genetic counseling . Every child is unique. I don’t think I wouldn’t have a wanted third child just because of bad pregnancies, especially since it sounds like once you give birth, you’re fine, and you found some successful mitigation strategies the 2nd go around that you can build on. ? Follow me on Twitter My Tweets. Finances and age are a consideration, however; I’m 30, my husband is 40, and he wants to be debt free in a few years and retired in 10. And honestly, with all the crap that’s gone on in the past 3-4 years, even the idea of having twins as our ‘3rd’ (ie 4 kids) doesn’t faze me! "Traditionally, baby showers were for first-time parents who were getting started and needed everything from diapers to draperies for their newborn," says etiquette expert Diane … Don’t know how this third pregnancy came about but been feeling kinda awful. My friend is 42 and trying to have another baby with her new husband. I now have four children. If it’s and comfort, you definitely get time for yourself again…..just wait about 5 years when your little one goes to school! having a third child a good or bad idea Jacqueline • Wed, Feb 14 hi thinking of having a third child and most of my friends say dont go for a third.. they regret it.. whats your thoughts ladies starting to make me question if i should or not Fourth time after a 14 year gap has been amazing too.  Yet. x. I stumbled upon this post through a Facebook link. To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet. In fact, he’s the easy one! I … I have 5 aged between 15 and 2 and i love it and them, Haha this made me laugh… I have 3… oldest girl 6, a middle girl 3 and a little boy 7 months… tbh I dint really feel a big change wi number 3… I found it so much harder going from 1-2 than I did 2-3… and I want a 4th… but not for a couple of years… there’s been a consistency in the age gaps and I want to keep it that way! In this thread an expecting mom asks Community members if labor with their third was faster. Here's the honest — and humorous — truth about what it's like when you add a third baby to your family. Hoda Kotb tells People this month she and her fiancé, Joel Schiffman, have seriously discussed adopting a third child. Of course the love is there with your 3 children just I needed a perspective on the other bits that confuse me as to whether I could cope with three and whether it would balance with how we live our family life. Your email address will not be published. On the fence as well. It’s the remaining 10,075 minutes I struggle with. Hi Melanie. I spent the majority of my 30s either being pregnant or having a baby. My girls are 10 and 7 and my boy is 4 and my house is constant chaos ,noise and arguing but I wouldn’t change it for the world ? Yes I was constantly tired and always looked like I’d been dragged through a hedge backwards (usually because my eldest wanted to do my hair and I’d let her) but life also had a sense of contentment about it. I will never know how my Mum managed 7 – especially when my father wasn’t that helpful. Jessica Alba and her husband, Cash Warren, have welcomed their third child together, Us Weekly can confirm. But I’ve compiled a little list anyway. At age 40, the risk is 1 in 100. AND the other 2 seem to have become monsters over night!! We’ll see! “It’s not rational!” is how I have explained our decision to have a third child to everyone from my obstetrician, my boss, my friends and my family over the past nine months. Thank you for your wonderful insight! I have always wanted a little boy even before I got married and I always thought I would have 3 kids. Maybe baby. I was a teen mom, now a college educated, successful working professional. I just hope your children never read this! It doesn’t help that I feel surrounded by bAbies.. And don’t get me wrong, I love them! Advice For Moms Before Having a Third Baby 11 Things No One Tells You About Having a Third Baby. But it also broke my heart. I know I should feel content with my healthy two girls, but my heart yearns for a little boy. but thought would share that there are all sorts of possible outcomes, and generally we just deal with what life throws at us - a third child, no third child - a fourth child, no fourth child etc. There are a few things that I now realise (though its taken a while to get there). We hivered and hovered back and forth between going for another or stopping at two, we weren't in the best financial situation but felt that time was marching on and we couldn't leave the decision any longer.In the end we had a really long, completely honest talk about whether we just liked the idea of having another 'baby' or we actually wanted another 'child'. We have in the same boat. I wouldnt change a thing, she is gorgeous and her brothers adore her. No, 37 is not too old to have a baby. Oh dear, I am 24 weeks pregnant with our third and not looking forward to the sleepless nights!! I’m hoping that the older two being quite self-sufficient means that number 3 will be slightly less stressful(!). We’ve been thinking about having a third so there’s plenty of food for thought in this post. When you have your third child, you have a pre-schooler and a toddler both claiming they are the center of the universe. I assume my body has tightened back up. Thank you for linking to PoCoLo 🙂 x. Having said that DS3 is an absolute darling, he is so much fun (now 19 months) and his older brothers adore him. Anyone rergret NOT having a third? Sometimes, when you feel like you’ve been up and down all the hills anyway (PND x2 as well in there & rather lost out financially with work), some things just don’t look scary anymore. - £200 voucher and £100 Thomas toys to be won, Ask the Food Standards Agency experts your questions about food allergies and intolerances. gee thanks everyone. I wish I had a third.If I was younger I would have another one.We have 2 with large age gap due to fertility problems.HArd to give advice though- how does your dh feel? I have two beautiful girls aged 7 and 3 and I really want to try for a boy. You really don't need to worry about down syndrome etc. And there is me wanting number two….I must be mad!! And the truth is, I wouldn’t (and not just because I can’t). Since my first was so easy, I figured Baby 2 would be the one that was fussy, didn't sleep, screamed constantly, had constant problems, etc. I found going from 2 to 3 easier than 1 to 2 (probably as the boys are at school all day so I have time to spend with dd when they are out and then don't have to feel guilty if she has to wait while I spend time with them after school).When I thought about having a third child, I imagined in my head our little family of four as a sort of square shape, when I imagined adding another child into the mix the square sort of morphed into a circle and felt much cosier and more like a hug. I'm certainly not on a mission to prevent third children, but can see how the posts would be interpreted that way. Just more potatoes and shouting. Brilliant. same here I just turn 39 I have am almost 11 years old and almost 5 both girls. Never a dull moment . I have a 2 ds, one just turned 4 and another 18 months. i know my life will be on hold for the next 2-3 years, due to cost of childcare and a lil financial difficulties because i will be out of work but i actually dont mind. Loved some of these. It can be harder to dine at a … To anyone who has looked slightly aghast at the news, knowing, as they generally do, the chaos that an average week in our family entails. But I think I would have a hard time going back to work! Geriatric pregnancy is a rarely used term for having a baby when you’re 35 or older. And I wouldn’t put any of mine back either. I am 42 this year and would love it if I was able to have another child.My son is now nearly 21 yrs old and I have foster children under 5yrs of age but I would be in my element if I had my own second child - just never found anyone I wanted to have a child with.You are both still young,if you want it and can afford to have another I would try for another. You are describing my exact situation. I am opted as well to go for an amnio if my doctor will suggest it to us. I have tormented myself since dd was one about having another one - "just one more" - but my husband made it very clear that he was happy with the two we had and did not want anymore. To answer your last side note q, my husband actually WANTS a third child regardless of our age. Our other 3 are 12 11 and 9 yrs old so this really is going back to the start. Chrissy Teigen and John Legend are adding to their family. We have loud, rambunctious children, so what’s a bit more noise, eh? Hang in there and try not to overthink things. I am pregnant with my 3rd baby but I have a step son too so this is our 4th child between us. I don't love the bills however!!! I have no rational explanation for this . ( sorry if its sensitive).i'm just not sure what to do. I'm sure it will all be fine... well, it has to be doesn't it! Things seem perfect now with two but life would always change and go through phases even if you didn’t have a third. dh not keen, so that's our decision then (not after sympathy re dc3 btw lol - she's v lovely. Ha! I feel more comfortable in myself and happier with my body. She told the officer that she was a victim of domestic violence, … I've run a few posts lately on the difficulties of having three children and the merits of having just two. I am totally understanding the chaos from already two so close that it’s now just a bit of selfish reasons getting “my time” back won’t happen for a while I’m liking the idea of not changing houses or cars or the lack of sleep 🙂 it’s been up in the air for a while now and it’s hard to get good feed back.. so thanks and feel free to last on more ?? Even trips around town are an ordeal again. I've spent a lot of time in the BabyCenter Community reading threads in which expecting moms share stories about the length of labor. I had my first child at 35, second at 36, third at 37. This was a huge decision that we debated over for many months. I then felt that we were all together like we should be. In spite of whatever experience and confidence I thought I had in my corner from having nursed two children, my third child was the hardest to breastfeed. The chances of twins increases with age and with the number of previous children. Dd is an absolute treasure. My DS is 6 1/2 and my DD is 5. It’s so much harder than I thought but all worth it for him. Do I really want to lose out on the fact that me and my husband can go out at night together alone? Some we do not even consider any longer since they're so prevalent, like owning your automobile to work. Every day I’m wondering if we will have a third or be content with the 2. Looking at trying end of the year if we do decide yes so my daughter would be almost 2 when we conceive. And i mean WE. Well, there’s four scenarios for you right there. My wife really wanted a third child and I was happy with two. There are occasions (on average, about 10 an hour) when I think we must have been mad to have had a third child. And I needed that so badly?truly wishing you the very best; but it would seem u already have your A-game on mommy! It was the safer choice. and no, I'm not broody this time round. in fact i think that getting 'closure' on the whole wanting a boy thing, is one of the reasons why its taken a while to consider a 3rd. ie- for years i knew i didnt want to go on some mad quest for a son, but hadnt let go enough of this issue to have a 3rd child and not mind about the sex.for 2-3 years after dd2 was born i felt that i'd def have a 3rd if it was guaranteed to be a boy. I'm 37 end of this month. I know it was the right thing to do. Not negative but realistic. Well guess I am not having a third. Still smiling, though feeling a bit battered! You want to avoid it. For practical reasons we will wait until next year to start trying, but I am soooo broody! Still, I understood why those friends were amused by our … They can help figure out if your baby is likely to have … Check out my 3 Kids section on the blog – there’s lots of reassurance there as well as a post I loved when I fell pregnant accidentally with no. #PoCoLo. But then the girls were all well behaved and only played up when they saw their mum and dad. You’ll be ok x. I know that I can't cos of my health, we have a close age gap between ds1 and ds2 (would it be fair anyway?? so we when back and open the conversation and know we are just hanging inthere. When I had just two daughters I had a strange feeling that someone was missing and so had my third daughter. Yes, having a third child can be an all-consuming question that throws you into turmoil. Your liSt doesn’t put me off in the slightest. This article has helped me. 3 was the best thing we ever did and now we are blessed with 3 girls I am sick of answering the “3girls are you mad?” questions. Having a third child changes everything. My mother had her 4th at 42. Baby 1 one was a ridiculously easy baby. Laughed out loud more than once. Chrissy Teigen and John Legend have announced that they are expecting a third child. But i know we will BREEZE through it. I struggle with 2, not sure what a third thrown in to the mix would do to me! I was very upset about this...then he suddenly turned round and said yes to number 3! They are at least mostly very good sleepers. I am so so so broody for our third but we can't cos of medical reasons. They knew I was always there for them and I expected them to behave and treated the like my own with consistency. What did you decide?! thankyou so, so much everyone. I had my first at 32 and second at 37. I’m glad it helped! Rebecca signed the paper. Your ability to travel will probably change. I just wish I had a bit more time up my sleeve as turning 38 at the end of this year makes me think I don’t have all the time in the world to decide on a 3rd, or even a 4th (!). I meet men all the time, but like millions of other women, I haven't ever been married. A really hard call yet to be made. (To begin with it was me that wanted another and dh was totally anti.) I love my life the way it is at the moment, back to work, kids in full time, 2 bedrooms flat, a lovely, helpful partner.  Proud. A mother of two girls and pregnant with no. Just when you’ve settled into life with an HD-TV and PVR, you’re back to rubbing two sticks together to make fire. That age gap has been hard work. A third child feels like an indulgence; “more than the world needs”, to quote a friend and fellow mum of three. As a 43-year-old dad of a 3-year-old and an 8-month-old, I'm …  You’d be better off heading over to the lovely 3 Children and It. I m a bloke on a bus with a clearblue in my back pocket laughing out loud from the comments and on my way to cement it tonight. Nope. I haven’ t slept over a week not sure what to do. Darlene Lujan, 25, was stopped by a state trooper at a gas station after another motorist called 911 to report a drunk driver.Lujan was parked with her younger sister, a toddler, and an infant in the car when the officer arrived. However, interviews with parents, demographers and officials suggest that some local authorities are quietly allowing families to have a third child without the usual repercussions. X, This made me smile, I’m a single mum of 3 (age 11, 6 & 3) and can relate to some of these points social life is non existent lol but my children a are the only life I need right now, Amy this has made me giggle. I just found this post, and of ALL the stuff I’ve read online about wether to have a 3er child or not, this is definitely THE BEST! I’ve been really struggling with the decision-making process and now it’s so clear: none of the above has put me off. Hi I’m 37 and I just found out I’m pregnant 9 weeks. At the beggining we always talk about having 3 kids but We left much difference between them and know I just think is starting all over again. Am a 25 years old young lady, i had twins a boy & girl age 4 years, now pregnant with my 3rd, cried my eyes out when i found out. God bless you and your family! That’s brilliant. there will be no little "accidents" here). however, i now couldnt imagine having a boy as i'm so used to girls. Love this, sounds a lot like us! What did you do? Don’t know whether I will regret not having another more than I would if I had one!! If they open up schools all at once, I'm done with every other precaution. [daft old hippie emoticon] I know that sounds daft, but it has been a bit like that for us. However now I have identified those feelings in myself I feel so much happier and confident that, for us, sticking with two children is the right thing to do. Great honest article! Thank you I ‘m glad I read this. They said they were worried that if another child came along they wouldnt be best friends anymore. I love her dearly and have sacrificed everything for her to be successful. Ive just had my third at 40. my other two were at 32 and 35. it took a long time to convince my dh that we should have a third, and a while to conceive. (Nothing major, just nasty morning sickness, anaemia and total all encompassing exhaustion). I am feeling very nervous at he moment and have moments of happiness as I get very excited at another little ds/dd coming into our family but I am also getting overwhelming scary feelings like 'what have I done' what about my kids' can we afford it etc am I going to feel like this till the arrival. This is page 1 of 2 (This thread has 45 messages.). I think he will hate me. What did you decide it 2019 now your post was 2016. Even though men can conceive later in life, men over 40 are at high risk of having a child with complications like Autism or still birth, Coddington said.

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